My team at work had an "offsite" yesterday. We typically have these every few months, and they range from being really painful to being really fun. I've helped plan a few, and let me tell you, the ones I plan are of the "really fun" variety.
Or, at least, that's what I've been told.
Hmm, I'll look into that.
Anyhow, yesterday we went to lunch and then went bowling. Now, you see, I took bowling in college. As a class. For credit. Am I an even bigger dork than you imagined me being? You betcha.
But, it was fun, and I didn't have to change clothes in the middle of a day full of classes back then, so it worked for me. And I got an "A" so there!
My co-workers found out that I had been trained in the art of bowling, and thus, the teasing commenced early yesterday morning. I kept telling them that I wasn't very good. That I hadn't bowled in ages. That I had no idea how to bowl. But they didn't buy it. They kept calling me a "ringer" and telling me that I was going to kick their collective butts.
Well, I did.
At least a little bit :)
I bowled my all-time highest game ever! You should know that I'm fiercely competitive, even about stuff that doesn't even matter. Stuff that's supposed to be light-hearted and fun? Yeah, I'd better win. Stuff that I've never even attempted to do before in my life, but the winner gets a cool ribbon? Sure, I expect myself to finish among the top few. So when the teasing started around the office, my secret desire to show off my skillzz started to heighten. But I played it cool. A strike, here, a spare there. And tada! I finished well above my average on both games.
Though my team didn't win (we averaged everyone's scores), I was still pleased with our performance. Sure, it did sting a little to not be awarded the top prize. And yes, I know it's all about being a team player. Though I was heckled, no insults came out of my mouth. Though I was mistreated, I showed kindness to the folks on the other team :) I was a good girl.
So here's to bowling. I guess my time and tuition in college finally paid off.
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Monday, April 24, 2006
This internet thing is exhausting!
We all know that there is a wealth of information on-line ranging from aardvarks to zoology. There are "how to" articles on bar-be-que and vacuums. You can google pretty much anything and get a minimum of a million hits.
But, when a consumer, let's just say it's me for now, is trying to research a product for a potential purchase, where does she start? Let's say I'm trying to buy a washer and dryer. I do a little search on-line.
BAM!
13,800 results.
Thank you, Google.
I'm the kind of person who wants all the facts before I make a major purchase. I want to know what Consumer Reports says about the last 4 generations of the appliance. I want to know which store has the best price out of the 1,000 out there that sell the thing.
Are there any rebates? Any financing offers? Any delivery charges? Any scratch and dent discounts? I need to know before I hand over money.
But at some point I have to draw the line. I have to admit that I can only know so much before I really need to make a decision. I can only make so many spread sheets before the clear winner starts to emerge.
With such a vast body of knowledge available with relative ease, I feel at some level that it's irresponsible of me to not do all the research possible. I feel a burden of guilt if I don't walk out of the store with the absolute best appliance and the absolute best price.
Geez. That's a lot of pressure.
When did an asset turn into a liability?
But y'all, if you do know of a good washer and dryer out there, I'd love to hear about it :)
But, when a consumer, let's just say it's me for now, is trying to research a product for a potential purchase, where does she start? Let's say I'm trying to buy a washer and dryer. I do a little search on-line.
BAM!
13,800 results.
Thank you, Google.
I'm the kind of person who wants all the facts before I make a major purchase. I want to know what Consumer Reports says about the last 4 generations of the appliance. I want to know which store has the best price out of the 1,000 out there that sell the thing.
Are there any rebates? Any financing offers? Any delivery charges? Any scratch and dent discounts? I need to know before I hand over money.
But at some point I have to draw the line. I have to admit that I can only know so much before I really need to make a decision. I can only make so many spread sheets before the clear winner starts to emerge.
With such a vast body of knowledge available with relative ease, I feel at some level that it's irresponsible of me to not do all the research possible. I feel a burden of guilt if I don't walk out of the store with the absolute best appliance and the absolute best price.
Geez. That's a lot of pressure.
When did an asset turn into a liability?
But y'all, if you do know of a good washer and dryer out there, I'd love to hear about it :)
Thursday, April 20, 2006
A brief little glimpse into my world:
Them: Build me a house.
Me: Ok, we can do that. Let's talk about the details.
Them: When will it be done?
Me: Again, let's talk about the details.
Them: How much will it cost?
Me: I can't give you a good estimate until I know what you want the house to be like.
Them: I want it to have a kitchen. When will it be ready?
Me: That's a good start. I have a few other questions for you about
the details.
Them: Look, I need this done in 15 days.
Me: (muffled laughter/panic)
Them: What? You're telling me you can't finish it in 15 days? When
will it be done? How much will it cost.
Me: Like I said earlier, I can't give you those numbers until we
know the specifics of the house you'd like us to build you. We have people working on other houses right now, and unless yours is more important that the others that are already in the process of being built, you'll have to wait.
Them: All I want is a small house! You're telling me that you can't just put together a house for me real quick?!?!
Me: That's correct.
Them: This is insane....when can you get my house done?
Me: Let's get some more of the details pulled together and I'll let you know what the estimates will be. What else do you need in your house? Where do you want it? Do you care about school districts, proximity to neighbors, size of the lawn, number of bedrooms?
Them: I want 3 bedrooms.
Me: Ok. Where do you want the bedrooms? What size should they be? Do you want them to have closets? Bathrooms? Carpet?
Them: I want them on the third floor.
Me: Oh, so you want a multiple-level house?
Them: Heck yeah! I thought you knew that already!!!
Me: You hadn't mentioned that detail yet.
Them: Well what's wrong with you?!
Me: I can't tell you what you want. I can help guide you through the process of figuring out what the details are. I can help form the team to build the house, and I can do everything possible to stick to the schedule and budget. But you have to fill in the details so that we can know exactly how long it will take to build it, and how much it will cost.
Them: There is so much red tape around here!
Me: I understand it's a lengthy process, but we have to know what we're building before we start building it.
Them: You people are crazy. I hate working with builders!
Me: Can we get back to the details of the house?
Them: I've had enough.
Me: We can still help you if you'll talk through some of this with us.
Them: I'm going to build it myself.
Me: I wouldn't advise that. Building a house is quite a complicated activity. It's best to get people on the team who have experience in this field.
Them: I'm outta here.
Me: Please let us know if there is anything else we can do to help.
***1 year later***
Them: My house is broken, can you fix it?
Me: We didn't build this house, so I'm not sure that we can fix it.
Them: But the house is in a neighborhood surrounded by other houses you've built. Can't you do something!?!?! This is an emergency!!
Me: I understand that there is a problem, but none of my builders have any idea of how this house was built. You built it yourself. We'll do what we can to help, but I can't guarantee that we can fix it.
Them: I'm suing your company.
Me: Please understand - we had nothing to do with the construction or maintenance of this property. You supplied the materials, the builders, the blueprint, the plans, the budget, etc. Our company is in no way related to the existence of this house.
Them: Blueprint?
And scene.
Them: Build me a house.
Me: Ok, we can do that. Let's talk about the details.
Them: When will it be done?
Me: Again, let's talk about the details.
Them: How much will it cost?
Me: I can't give you a good estimate until I know what you want the house to be like.
Them: I want it to have a kitchen. When will it be ready?
Me: That's a good start. I have a few other questions for you about
the details.
Them: Look, I need this done in 15 days.
Me: (muffled laughter/panic)
Them: What? You're telling me you can't finish it in 15 days? When
will it be done? How much will it cost.
Me: Like I said earlier, I can't give you those numbers until we
know the specifics of the house you'd like us to build you. We have people working on other houses right now, and unless yours is more important that the others that are already in the process of being built, you'll have to wait.
Them: All I want is a small house! You're telling me that you can't just put together a house for me real quick?!?!
Me: That's correct.
Them: This is insane....when can you get my house done?
Me: Let's get some more of the details pulled together and I'll let you know what the estimates will be. What else do you need in your house? Where do you want it? Do you care about school districts, proximity to neighbors, size of the lawn, number of bedrooms?
Them: I want 3 bedrooms.
Me: Ok. Where do you want the bedrooms? What size should they be? Do you want them to have closets? Bathrooms? Carpet?
Them: I want them on the third floor.
Me: Oh, so you want a multiple-level house?
Them: Heck yeah! I thought you knew that already!!!
Me: You hadn't mentioned that detail yet.
Them: Well what's wrong with you?!
Me: I can't tell you what you want. I can help guide you through the process of figuring out what the details are. I can help form the team to build the house, and I can do everything possible to stick to the schedule and budget. But you have to fill in the details so that we can know exactly how long it will take to build it, and how much it will cost.
Them: There is so much red tape around here!
Me: I understand it's a lengthy process, but we have to know what we're building before we start building it.
Them: You people are crazy. I hate working with builders!
Me: Can we get back to the details of the house?
Them: I've had enough.
Me: We can still help you if you'll talk through some of this with us.
Them: I'm going to build it myself.
Me: I wouldn't advise that. Building a house is quite a complicated activity. It's best to get people on the team who have experience in this field.
Them: I'm outta here.
Me: Please let us know if there is anything else we can do to help.
Them: My house is broken, can you fix it?
Me: We didn't build this house, so I'm not sure that we can fix it.
Them: But the house is in a neighborhood surrounded by other houses you've built. Can't you do something!?!?! This is an emergency!!
Me: I understand that there is a problem, but none of my builders have any idea of how this house was built. You built it yourself. We'll do what we can to help, but I can't guarantee that we can fix it.
Them: I'm suing your company.
Me: Please understand - we had nothing to do with the construction or maintenance of this property. You supplied the materials, the builders, the blueprint, the plans, the budget, etc. Our company is in no way related to the existence of this house.
Them: Blueprint?
Monday, April 17, 2006
why? Why? WHY?!?
City of Austin,
I thought that you had come up with every possible way to thwart my commute home from work.
School zones? Check.
Ill-timed lights? Check.
Overcrowding of poorly-maintained streets? Check.
But this is just too much.
Why on EARTH would you schedule "rolling blackouts" that impact traffic lights during evening rush hour? Sidestreets? Clogged. Major intersections? Clogged. Exit ramps and cut-throughs? Clogged.
Yes, we know it's hot. It's been getting increasingly hot for the last 2 weeks. You knew this. You saw this coming. Why is this an emergency? And seriously - do traffic lights really use up that much energy?
The definition of an emergency.
(note the flagrant use of the word "unexpected"...)
Need we spell it out for you? Apparently...yes.
I paid my electricity bill today. Maybe you could take some of that money and put it to use beefing up the infrastructure around here? Just a thought.
Now, if you really need to save some energy, I can give you the name and address of my place of business. Feel free to make cuts there anytime tomorrow between 8-5. Believe me, it's fine with me and the rest of my co-workers. Have at it.
Thank you.
I thought that you had come up with every possible way to thwart my commute home from work.
School zones? Check.
Ill-timed lights? Check.
Overcrowding of poorly-maintained streets? Check.
But this is just too much.
Why on EARTH would you schedule "rolling blackouts" that impact traffic lights during evening rush hour? Sidestreets? Clogged. Major intersections? Clogged. Exit ramps and cut-throughs? Clogged.
Yes, we know it's hot. It's been getting increasingly hot for the last 2 weeks. You knew this. You saw this coming. Why is this an emergency? And seriously - do traffic lights really use up that much energy?
The definition of an emergency.
(note the flagrant use of the word "unexpected"...)
Need we spell it out for you? Apparently...yes.
I paid my electricity bill today. Maybe you could take some of that money and put it to use beefing up the infrastructure around here? Just a thought.
Now, if you really need to save some energy, I can give you the name and address of my place of business. Feel free to make cuts there anytime tomorrow between 8-5. Believe me, it's fine with me and the rest of my co-workers. Have at it.
Thank you.
Friday, April 14, 2006
Adults say the darndest things
As I settled into work this morning with my cuppa coffee, I started catching up on some of the other blogs that I read. I don't remember how I started reading Finslippy, but she cracks me up. I think she was nominated for "best blog writing" for last year's bloggies, which is likely where I picked up her link.
Anyhow:
I was reading this post and really trying hard to keep my laughter to myself as I read through the comments.
I don't have kids. I want them eventually, but I do not currently have any of my own. However, if and when I do, I cannot wait to keep a journal of funny things that 1) I say to them and 2) they say to me and/or others.
It reminds me of one of my jobs in college. I worked at a campus library at A&M. Our office was situated right inside the main entrance, and though it was not our primary job role, we served as a makeshift help desk for the library. What do you get when you combine some sassy, bored college kids and a bunch of random patrons asking dumb questions all day?
A little black book.
We constantly kept track of the dumb questions/weird conversations/general hilarity that happened at the front desk. That black book served us well for years. It was the backbone of the camaraderie we felt with our co-workers. We would hand it off between shifts, everyone adding their own two cents.
Here, my friend Michael recounts one of the stories. It just so happens to be a story about me being stalked - very poorly.
Anyhow:
We had this supervisor that was _not_a_fan_whatsoever_ of the book. He lectured us that if any patron ever found it and started reading through it, all heck would break loose. But we were smarter than that. We changed the names to protect the *innocent* and just referenced people in our own special way. Characters like "British guy", "Creepy stalker guy" and "Flaky grad student" were the only "patron names" that anyone would ever find in there.
The battle was on. It was now our duty to protect our turf and our sanity. That black book kept us going on many occasions. Bringing life and humor to the darkest corners of the library. Ok, so maybe it wasn't that dramatic, but we didn't want to lose the book. We still have little reunions where we recount the silly tales of the library. Fun stuff.
Anyhow:
I'd like to keep a book like that when I have kids. Just to remember the fun times.
Anyhow:
I was reading this post and really trying hard to keep my laughter to myself as I read through the comments.
I don't have kids. I want them eventually, but I do not currently have any of my own. However, if and when I do, I cannot wait to keep a journal of funny things that 1) I say to them and 2) they say to me and/or others.
It reminds me of one of my jobs in college. I worked at a campus library at A&M. Our office was situated right inside the main entrance, and though it was not our primary job role, we served as a makeshift help desk for the library. What do you get when you combine some sassy, bored college kids and a bunch of random patrons asking dumb questions all day?
A little black book.
We constantly kept track of the dumb questions/weird conversations/general hilarity that happened at the front desk. That black book served us well for years. It was the backbone of the camaraderie we felt with our co-workers. We would hand it off between shifts, everyone adding their own two cents.
Here, my friend Michael recounts one of the stories. It just so happens to be a story about me being stalked - very poorly.
Anyhow:
We had this supervisor that was _not_a_fan_whatsoever_ of the book. He lectured us that if any patron ever found it and started reading through it, all heck would break loose. But we were smarter than that. We changed the names to protect the *innocent* and just referenced people in our own special way. Characters like "British guy", "Creepy stalker guy" and "Flaky grad student" were the only "patron names" that anyone would ever find in there.
The battle was on. It was now our duty to protect our turf and our sanity. That black book kept us going on many occasions. Bringing life and humor to the darkest corners of the library. Ok, so maybe it wasn't that dramatic, but we didn't want to lose the book. We still have little reunions where we recount the silly tales of the library. Fun stuff.
Anyhow:
I'd like to keep a book like that when I have kids. Just to remember the fun times.
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
I can quit anytime. Just not today.
I'm not one to be obsessed with celebrities.
Sure, when I have some downtime in the cubicle, I read up on the MSN Gossip every now and then. And yes, I peruse the front pages of the "magazines" in the checkout line at the grocery store, but who doesn't?
But today, I've stumbled upon a couple of links that just crack me up. I have no idea why I keep clicking "next" on this site, but I do.
And then there's this one, which isn't so much a celebrity site, but is still funny, especially if you read it with a Spanish accent in your head.
And last but not least, there's this one. Somewhat sketchy, yes. Somewhat funny, also yes.
Enjoy!
Sure, when I have some downtime in the cubicle, I read up on the MSN Gossip every now and then. And yes, I peruse the front pages of the "magazines" in the checkout line at the grocery store, but who doesn't?
But today, I've stumbled upon a couple of links that just crack me up. I have no idea why I keep clicking "next" on this site, but I do.
And then there's this one, which isn't so much a celebrity site, but is still funny, especially if you read it with a Spanish accent in your head.
And last but not least, there's this one. Somewhat sketchy, yes. Somewhat funny, also yes.
Enjoy!
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Afternoon snack
I'm eating cranberries that have been dried and flavored to taste like strawberries.
What is this world coming to?
What is this world coming to?
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
What I'm up to...notable, and not so much
- I'm back in the U.S.
- I'm still taking malaria medicine. Yuck.
- I'm spending quality time in my cubicle.
- I also spent quality time with my DVR last night.
- I'm caught up with Lost.
- I'm going to two weddings on Saturday. Crazy.
- I turn 26 in 8 days. Also crazy.
- I still have henna on my extremities, and it's staring to look like I have a skin condition.
- I'm caught up on sleep...or so I think.
- I'm once again thankful for U.S. bathrooms.
- My car is making a seriously scary squealing noise.
- I got a new hairdryer. Complete with ions. Fancy.
- I still fully enjoy MS Excel. A little too much.
- My bamboo plant is still alive after 2 weeks of neglect.
- I haven't worked out in 2 weeks. I'm scared to go back.
- I haven't been to church in way too long. I miss it.
- I get married in 135 days. Wow.
- I'm caught up on work email. A (small) victory.
- I still have unpacking left to do from India.
- Amar moves into our future apartment next week.
- I'm spending 8 hours at a golf course on Friday. For work.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Travel journal
For those of you who want to keep tabs on us while we're in India, try this on for size:
My Trip Journal
My Trip Journal
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Monday, March 20, 2006
Updates
1) We're going to India in 3 days. 3 days!!
2) I bought a wedding dress!! Crazy.
3) I start taking malaria pills tomorrow - wish me luck.
4) God is really stinkin' good. I have to re-learn that every day.
5) Everyone is having babies, and those babies are exceptionally cute.
And you? How are things?
2) I bought a wedding dress!! Crazy.
3) I start taking malaria pills tomorrow - wish me luck.
4) God is really stinkin' good. I have to re-learn that every day.
5) Everyone is having babies, and those babies are exceptionally cute.
And you? How are things?
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Nose to the grindstone
Totally getting a kick out of this.
For an afternoon of fun after downloading Bullfighter:
1) Open your work email
2) Select an email from a high-ranking co-worker
3) Ctrl + A
4) Ctrl + C
5) Open a document (MS Word, or other)
6) Ctrl + V
7) Click the magic bull and voila - fun for the whole family.
For an afternoon of fun after downloading Bullfighter:
1) Open your work email
2) Select an email from a high-ranking co-worker
3) Ctrl + A
4) Ctrl + C
5) Open a document (MS Word, or other)
6) Ctrl + V
7) Click the magic bull and voila - fun for the whole family.
Monday, March 13, 2006
Still alive, I think
I promise I haven't been hiding. It's just been crazy lately, and that means that after I prioritize all that I can do in one day, blogging falls off the list quickly. So, I figure that I owe you a new post. After all, it's been awhile.
I'm recovering from a long weekend, filled mostly with work. My job sometimes requires me to work some pretty icky hours, and this weekend was no exception. I woke up at 8:00 AM on Saturday morning ready to go to brunch with my fiance and a bunch of his friends at 9:30. The brunch got pushed to 10:30, so I cleaned the bathroom - yes, very glamorous indeed.
Brunch was good, but for some reason, I could barely eat anything on my plate. After some fun conversation, making funny faces at baby Xavier, and downing a few gallons of coffee, to the mall we went.
Amar and I are leaving for India in a little less than two weeks, so we figured it was about time to stock up on some clothes, since my closet has been a little thin lately. And shop we did! Keeping in mind that it will be crazy hot and humid in Madras when we're there, we selected some things that would be conservative, but would still be comfy and cool. I think we succeeded.
We then sat down to watch Monsoon Wedding. It was my first "Indian" movie and I really enjoyed it. Though we won't be getting married in India, Amar's parents are throwing a party for us, so it was good to be exposed to a little of the culture. I seriously can't wait for the trip!
Then it was off to work :( We started around 5:30 PM on Saturday, and I didn't walk out of there until 1:30 PM the next day. Yeah, much more time than I would normally like to spend at the office on a weekend...but after a lot of work, we were successful and were able to leave and go sleep. A lot. I wound up staying awake for about 32 hours. I am not good at that kind of thing, so in the end, I wound up acting like a cranky 4 year old. Yes, I know, real mature of me. But I think I've recovered now.
And the countdown to India begins :)
How was your weekend? I know some people got to go see David Gray.
I'm recovering from a long weekend, filled mostly with work. My job sometimes requires me to work some pretty icky hours, and this weekend was no exception. I woke up at 8:00 AM on Saturday morning ready to go to brunch with my fiance and a bunch of his friends at 9:30. The brunch got pushed to 10:30, so I cleaned the bathroom - yes, very glamorous indeed.
Brunch was good, but for some reason, I could barely eat anything on my plate. After some fun conversation, making funny faces at baby Xavier, and downing a few gallons of coffee, to the mall we went.
Amar and I are leaving for India in a little less than two weeks, so we figured it was about time to stock up on some clothes, since my closet has been a little thin lately. And shop we did! Keeping in mind that it will be crazy hot and humid in Madras when we're there, we selected some things that would be conservative, but would still be comfy and cool. I think we succeeded.
We then sat down to watch Monsoon Wedding. It was my first "Indian" movie and I really enjoyed it. Though we won't be getting married in India, Amar's parents are throwing a party for us, so it was good to be exposed to a little of the culture. I seriously can't wait for the trip!
Then it was off to work :( We started around 5:30 PM on Saturday, and I didn't walk out of there until 1:30 PM the next day. Yeah, much more time than I would normally like to spend at the office on a weekend...but after a lot of work, we were successful and were able to leave and go sleep. A lot. I wound up staying awake for about 32 hours. I am not good at that kind of thing, so in the end, I wound up acting like a cranky 4 year old. Yes, I know, real mature of me. But I think I've recovered now.
And the countdown to India begins :)
How was your weekend? I know some people got to go see David Gray.
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
What to get the girl who has everything?
Ok, maybe I don't have everything, but much like my approach to buying shoes, I don't often find myself wanting for much. However, I stumbled upon this today and I must say, I'm tempted.
I'm tempted more by the idea of ridding my house of bugs relatively pain-free. However, being the avid bugophobe that I am, even zapping bugs from arms-length might be too close for comfort.
I once came home to find a giant stink bug perched precariously above the door to my apartment. I stood a great distance from the creature, pondering what to do. Various ideas raced through my head. Given that we lived on the second floor at the time, I contemplated what it would take to scale the wall, climb onto the balcony and somehow break into our apartment. I entertained the idea of just waiting it out - me vs. the bug. I thought about calling for backup, but was not confident that any of my friends would arrive in a timely manner.
So I resorted to the following: I took my shoe off, lobbed it at the bug, hoping to dislodge it from it's temporary home. I wasn't trying to kill it, necessarily, but just wanted to scare it enough so that it would fly or crawl away. If it chose to crawl, I would just avoid it until I could safely enter my home. However, if it chose to fly, my plan was to flail about hoping that it wouldn't land on me. So I threw shoe #1. Much to my displeasure, not only did I miss the bug, but I also failed to even make it flinch.
Freakin' bug. You won't get the best of me.
So I took off my other shoe and tossed it as well. Again, failure on two counts: the bug was still alive and still sitting right above my door. So I sat. And I thought. What's a girl to do? I was shoeless, and I couldn't get into my apartment, nor could I break into it successfully.
I probably waited outside for a good 5-10 minutes. Nothing. No movement. No sounds. No progress. Maybe it was dead? Could I take that chance? Images of the bug getting caught in my hair flooded my mind. Even as I type this, I can feel the fear welling up inside me once again.
After what seemed like an eternity, I decided that I would make a break for it. I readied my keys, forming a battle plan in my mind. I mentally rehearsed the quickest way to open the door, run inside and slam it shut behind me, making sure that I wasn't followed in by the monster.
I counted to 10, said a quick prayer, and made a break for it.
SUCCESS!!
I was safely inside in my bug-free apartment. A little while later my roommate came home. As I saw her entering the apartment, I motioned to her to get inside quickly, as the bug might still be waiting to pounce on its next unsuspecting victim. She looked at me like I was crazy, which wasn't really anything out of the ordinary. Then she asked me what the heck I was doing and why my shoes were outside. I sadly recounted the whole story to her, and wouldn't you know it, the bug had totally disappeared. So at that point, I was a barefoot blabbering idiot. Hey, at least I'm consistent :)
Wow...that was quite a tangent. Needless to say, I'm not sure that the bug vaccuum would even work for such an extreme case any of the following: Acarophobia, Arachnophobia, Apiphobia, Entomophobia, Insectophobia, Isopterophobia, Mottephobia.
Wow. That's a lot. For more on phobias, check this out.
I'm tempted more by the idea of ridding my house of bugs relatively pain-free. However, being the avid bugophobe that I am, even zapping bugs from arms-length might be too close for comfort.
I once came home to find a giant stink bug perched precariously above the door to my apartment. I stood a great distance from the creature, pondering what to do. Various ideas raced through my head. Given that we lived on the second floor at the time, I contemplated what it would take to scale the wall, climb onto the balcony and somehow break into our apartment. I entertained the idea of just waiting it out - me vs. the bug. I thought about calling for backup, but was not confident that any of my friends would arrive in a timely manner.
So I resorted to the following: I took my shoe off, lobbed it at the bug, hoping to dislodge it from it's temporary home. I wasn't trying to kill it, necessarily, but just wanted to scare it enough so that it would fly or crawl away. If it chose to crawl, I would just avoid it until I could safely enter my home. However, if it chose to fly, my plan was to flail about hoping that it wouldn't land on me. So I threw shoe #1. Much to my displeasure, not only did I miss the bug, but I also failed to even make it flinch.
Freakin' bug. You won't get the best of me.
So I took off my other shoe and tossed it as well. Again, failure on two counts: the bug was still alive and still sitting right above my door. So I sat. And I thought. What's a girl to do? I was shoeless, and I couldn't get into my apartment, nor could I break into it successfully.
I probably waited outside for a good 5-10 minutes. Nothing. No movement. No sounds. No progress. Maybe it was dead? Could I take that chance? Images of the bug getting caught in my hair flooded my mind. Even as I type this, I can feel the fear welling up inside me once again.
After what seemed like an eternity, I decided that I would make a break for it. I readied my keys, forming a battle plan in my mind. I mentally rehearsed the quickest way to open the door, run inside and slam it shut behind me, making sure that I wasn't followed in by the monster.
I counted to 10, said a quick prayer, and made a break for it.
SUCCESS!!
I was safely inside in my bug-free apartment. A little while later my roommate came home. As I saw her entering the apartment, I motioned to her to get inside quickly, as the bug might still be waiting to pounce on its next unsuspecting victim. She looked at me like I was crazy, which wasn't really anything out of the ordinary. Then she asked me what the heck I was doing and why my shoes were outside. I sadly recounted the whole story to her, and wouldn't you know it, the bug had totally disappeared. So at that point, I was a barefoot blabbering idiot. Hey, at least I'm consistent :)
Wow...that was quite a tangent. Needless to say, I'm not sure that the bug vaccuum would even work for such an extreme case any of the following: Acarophobia, Arachnophobia, Apiphobia, Entomophobia, Insectophobia, Isopterophobia, Mottephobia.
Wow. That's a lot. For more on phobias, check this out.
Monday, February 27, 2006
Happy Monday to my feet
I went shopping yesterday. Actually, Amar and I went shopping. And we had fun. We each bought each other shoes. And let me tell you, that has got to be the perfect date.
I'm wearing my new shoes at the office today. Sure, it's a little painful breaking them in, but that's the price you pay, right? And I love that some of the girls have noticed without me even saying anything. Love it.
It's funny, though, because I don't think of myself as a shoe person. Some girls go shoe-crazy! Their closets and floors are littered with dozens of pairs. I'm more of a minimalist. I buy things that I know aren't too trendy, fit well, are affordable, and that will go with a lot of things. So two pairs of brown, two pairs of black, and some shoes for the gym - I'm set. I often talk myself out of buying new shoes because "I already have some kind of like those" or "They don't go with very many things" etc. But I think there must be some sort of balance. I have been avoiding everything in my closet that goes with brown because I didn't have any brown dressy shoes. Literally, it's been awhile since I've worn some of that stuff simply because I was lacking in the shoe department.
But today, the other half of my closet has come to life!
No, I'm not advocating buying everything that you are even remotely interested in. But sometimes it's just fun to treat yourself. Yippee!
So happy Monday to my feet. I hope you're enjoying yourselves down there. You seem to be, from the reports I'm getting.
I'm wearing my new shoes at the office today. Sure, it's a little painful breaking them in, but that's the price you pay, right? And I love that some of the girls have noticed without me even saying anything. Love it.
It's funny, though, because I don't think of myself as a shoe person. Some girls go shoe-crazy! Their closets and floors are littered with dozens of pairs. I'm more of a minimalist. I buy things that I know aren't too trendy, fit well, are affordable, and that will go with a lot of things. So two pairs of brown, two pairs of black, and some shoes for the gym - I'm set. I often talk myself out of buying new shoes because "I already have some kind of like those" or "They don't go with very many things" etc. But I think there must be some sort of balance. I have been avoiding everything in my closet that goes with brown because I didn't have any brown dressy shoes. Literally, it's been awhile since I've worn some of that stuff simply because I was lacking in the shoe department.
But today, the other half of my closet has come to life!
No, I'm not advocating buying everything that you are even remotely interested in. But sometimes it's just fun to treat yourself. Yippee!
So happy Monday to my feet. I hope you're enjoying yourselves down there. You seem to be, from the reports I'm getting.
Friday, February 24, 2006
My Friday morning:
Alarm goes off at 5:45 AM.
I actually wake up around 7.
I get ready, make my lunch, and I'm out the door by 7:50.
I arrive at the office a little after 8.
I head to my desk, setup my stuff, and then go get breakfast.
Bagel, coffee, and the fixins.
As I sit at my desk and quietly eat my breakfast and catch up on email, I can't help but listen to a conversation two of my co-workers are having on the next cube aisle over. I strain to hear, thinking that I must be mistaken. But no, I'm not. There are actually two 50 year old men talking about Dancing with the Stars. And in detail!! Scary, probably accurate, detail. The phrases "He really is the best," and "She's easy on the eyes" were overheard.
Wow.
What a great start to a Friday :)
I actually wake up around 7.
I get ready, make my lunch, and I'm out the door by 7:50.
I arrive at the office a little after 8.
I head to my desk, setup my stuff, and then go get breakfast.
Bagel, coffee, and the fixins.
As I sit at my desk and quietly eat my breakfast and catch up on email, I can't help but listen to a conversation two of my co-workers are having on the next cube aisle over. I strain to hear, thinking that I must be mistaken. But no, I'm not. There are actually two 50 year old men talking about Dancing with the Stars. And in detail!! Scary, probably accurate, detail. The phrases "He really is the best," and "She's easy on the eyes" were overheard.
Wow.
What a great start to a Friday :)
Thursday, February 23, 2006
An open letter to the automated bathroom
Automated bathroom:
I'm not a fan of you. With your self-flushing toilets, your self watering sinks, your self-dispensing paper towels, and your self-squirting soaps. Not a fan at all. You wind up flushing at the wrong time. You wind up turning the water off on me when my hands are lathered in soap. You wind up making me wave my arms around like an idiot just so that one more paper towel might come out.
And I'm tired of it.
I can flush my own toilet. I'm pretty sure I can dispense my own soap and turn the sink on and off at the right times. And for the love, I can grab my own paper towels.
Please, just let me do it. Yes, I admit I do have a streak of wild independence in me, but let's not blame that right now. Let's consider, for once, that you are the control freak. After all, you won't let me even perform normal human functions on my own. You have to have your say in everything that goes on in the bathroom. Your close friend, the automatic door, is just fine in my book. Sometimes he's even helpful when I have a bunch of stuff in my hands, or after "arm day" at the gym when I literally can't lift my arm to open doors.
But you, on the other hand, are out of control. Sometimes you even make an eerie squealing sound before you flush, and for the life of me, that sound haunts me in my sleep. Maybe you're more sanitary. I'll give you that. But I think I may prefer getting sick to looking like a flailing idiot.
You, automated bathroom, are dead to me.
I'm not a fan of you. With your self-flushing toilets, your self watering sinks, your self-dispensing paper towels, and your self-squirting soaps. Not a fan at all. You wind up flushing at the wrong time. You wind up turning the water off on me when my hands are lathered in soap. You wind up making me wave my arms around like an idiot just so that one more paper towel might come out.
And I'm tired of it.
I can flush my own toilet. I'm pretty sure I can dispense my own soap and turn the sink on and off at the right times. And for the love, I can grab my own paper towels.
Please, just let me do it. Yes, I admit I do have a streak of wild independence in me, but let's not blame that right now. Let's consider, for once, that you are the control freak. After all, you won't let me even perform normal human functions on my own. You have to have your say in everything that goes on in the bathroom. Your close friend, the automatic door, is just fine in my book. Sometimes he's even helpful when I have a bunch of stuff in my hands, or after "arm day" at the gym when I literally can't lift my arm to open doors.
But you, on the other hand, are out of control. Sometimes you even make an eerie squealing sound before you flush, and for the life of me, that sound haunts me in my sleep. Maybe you're more sanitary. I'll give you that. But I think I may prefer getting sick to looking like a flailing idiot.
You, automated bathroom, are dead to me.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Theme song, party of 1
So my roommate Malita just blogged about finding a site that tells you your life's theme song. Check it out here.
#1 on the day I was born was "Call Me" by Blondie. I find this to be a somewhat unsuitable match, as talking on the phone isn't my favorite thing in the world. So I perused the lyrics to find anything at all that might apply to my life, that might give meaning to my existence. Alas, nothing. The girl just really wants the guy to call her.
Moving on to my life's theme song, which is the #1 song on your 18th birthday. Mine came out to be "All My Life" by K-Ci and Jojo. Well, it didn't take me long to find some really deep, meaningful stuff in that one. Who can argue with lyrics like:
What are your theme songs?
...again, total credit for all of the creativity inspired by today's post goes to Malita ;)
#1 on the day I was born was "Call Me" by Blondie. I find this to be a somewhat unsuitable match, as talking on the phone isn't my favorite thing in the world. So I perused the lyrics to find anything at all that might apply to my life, that might give meaning to my existence. Alas, nothing. The girl just really wants the guy to call her.
Moving on to my life's theme song, which is the #1 song on your 18th birthday. Mine came out to be "All My Life" by K-Ci and Jojo. Well, it didn't take me long to find some really deep, meaningful stuff in that one. Who can argue with lyrics like:
- I will never find another luva sweeta than you
- I will never find anutha luva more precious than you
- Said, I promise to never fall in love with a stranger
What are your theme songs?
...again, total credit for all of the creativity inspired by today's post goes to Malita ;)
Monday, February 13, 2006
Remind me next year
If I tell you that I'm going to the grocery store on the night before Valentine's day, please restrain me. This place was an absolute madhouse. Upon entering, the senses were overloaded with reds and magentas as far as the eye could see.
And the people. The people!! On average, there were about 76 people per aisle. And that's not even mentioning the dairy section. Any why does the store choose to restock at 5:30PM? My good GOSH! It was crazy. I thought that there might be an impending freeze or power outage or national crisis. But no. It's a bunch of flowers and pink paper flying off the shelves and into the hands of people who should already know that they are loved and cared for.
And on that note, I do have a date tomorrow. But I have no idea where we're going. I do know that it might involve ice cream, and for that I'm thankful.
Another thing I'm thankful for is this. Yes, I know it's poking fun at a somewhat tragic event. But still, it made me laugh out loud.
And the people. The people!! On average, there were about 76 people per aisle. And that's not even mentioning the dairy section. Any why does the store choose to restock at 5:30PM? My good GOSH! It was crazy. I thought that there might be an impending freeze or power outage or national crisis. But no. It's a bunch of flowers and pink paper flying off the shelves and into the hands of people who should already know that they are loved and cared for.
And on that note, I do have a date tomorrow. But I have no idea where we're going. I do know that it might involve ice cream, and for that I'm thankful.
Another thing I'm thankful for is this. Yes, I know it's poking fun at a somewhat tragic event. But still, it made me laugh out loud.
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